The static consumed intercom wheezes to life, "Can I get the manager to Sporting goods. Manager to sporting goods. Also, John Benjamin, the baby's yours."
As a horrified scream echoes through the store, Tourniquet sees Ear Ache being dropped off by his father, the eccentric Doctor Prostate.
The Doctor was a tiny little goblin compared to the behemoth that was somehow Ear Ache. He barely stood passed his creation's waist.
"Family eh?" Cutter says suddenly and Tourniquet feels his heart explode out of his eyes. Yet somehow he miraculously remained completely still in front of the madman.
Ear Ache hugs his father goodbye before stumbling on over and taking his place next to Tourniquet like a strange, eight hundred pound, hairless puppy while Tourniquet shrugs, "Never had one."
Then looking at Cutter, he continues, "You?" Cutter thinks for a moment, "Had a mother." He says and Tourniquet waits a long moment before realizing Cutter wasn't going to continue.
"And?..." he asks.
"Well apparently she wanted me to stay awake twenty four hours a day, reply to heinous texts from my sleep, cut off my dick, become a girl, quit my job, share her exact same beliefs, stay at home, and sit around the house all day ranting about the evils of men while scrapbooking and religiously watching The View."
Tourniquet's eyes widen. "Wow...." and almost too afraid to ask... "What did you do?"
Cutter smiles that wicked smile, "I cut her head off and used it as a makeshift lantern for when I explore the meat department."
Tourniquet stands there at a complete loss for words.
"Wanna see it?" Cutter then asks eagerly. "Umm no thanks." Tourniquet replies quickly. "Heh, your loss." Cutter chuckles and then wanders off on his merry, insane, way.
"I like The View." Ear Ache smiles.
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